The Care Home Tour: What You're Not Being Shown

Choosing a care home can feel overwhelming. Most families are making decisions during periods of stress, uncertainty and often exhaustion. It is entirely natural to rely heavily on the care home tour when deciding whether a service feels right.

However, after many years working within the sector, I would offer one piece of advice that sometimes surprises people:

If possible, don't just visit by appointment.

Drop in.

In fact, if your circumstances allow, consider visiting at a weekend.

That isn't because care homes are trying to deceive anyone. Every organisation naturally wants to present itself in the best possible light. The challenge is that a planned tour may not always provide the most representative picture of daily life.

During an arranged visit, you are likely to be shown the nicest available bedroom. The manager or admissions lead will understandably highlight the home's strengths. Refreshments may be waiting. Staff will often know a prospective family is arriving.

There is nothing wrong with any of that.

The difficulty is that many of the things that matter most are not immediately visible during a carefully planned visit.

A weekend visit can sometimes provide a different perspective. Managers are unlikely to be present. The person showing you around may be a member of the care team rather than somebody whose role includes receiving a bonus for filling beds. Conversations can feel less rehearsed and you may gain a better sense of how the home functions day to day.

As you walk around, use your senses:

What do you notice as soon as you enter the building? Does the home feel clean and well cared for? Are there unpleasant odours that suggest difficulties managing continence needs? Are call bells ringing repeatedly without response?

Do residents appear comfortable and occupied, or are large numbers sitting with little stimulation or interaction?

Look carefully at how communal areas are arranged. Are chairs positioned to encourage conversation, or lined up in regimental fashion around the walls facing a television? Are there quieter areas where residents can spend time with family or enjoy privacy?

Pay attention to staffing. Can you identify agency staff through different uniforms or name badges? A small amount of agency use is common across the sector, but heavy reliance may be worth exploring further.

Observe the interactions between staff and residents. Do staff know people by name? Is there warmth, humour and familiarity? These small moments often reveal far more than any brochure.

Don't be afraid to ask difficult questions. What happens if needs increase? How often do fees rise? What additional charges might be incurred? How many staff are on duty overnight? What happens if a resident's savings reduce over time?

If the person showing you around cannot answer every question, that isn't necessarily a concern. You can always return for a second visit or arrange a conversation with the manager later.

The most important thing is not to feel pressured into making a decision after a single tour.

For many families, a care home placement may ultimately cost well in excess of £150,000. Nursing care can exceed £250,000 over the course of an average stay. Decisions involving that level of financial and emotional commitment deserve time, careful thought and thorough investigation.

If you would like a free copy of my Care Home Visit Questions Checklist, please email me via the Contact page and I will be happy to send one to you.

Sometimes the questions you ask are just as important as the answers you receive.